butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
it hurts more in the daytime
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize