waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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