Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
