Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
this boner is exhausting
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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