left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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