Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
You can't just leave with hair like that
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Randomize
