Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
