I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
