Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Randomize
