jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
