Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
