where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Randomize
