brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Plan B is the new Plan A
there was a trapeze. enough said
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
