It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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