ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize