You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize