Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
