Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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