I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize
