Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Randomize
