After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
