the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
