it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
