How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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