how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
