i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
