So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
