Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
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