I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
she was so not down for the gang bang
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
