Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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