It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
