i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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