He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
