After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
