Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Just cropdusted the office
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
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