Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
