we have officially lost it.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
