My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
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