You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
