ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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