So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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