I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
me + whiskey = a bad person
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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