This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
