My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
