this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Boobs are out for the taking
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
