ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
