...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
