life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I'm always down for nudity.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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