if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
