Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
