so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Found your dick twin last night
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
